Subject: How Can a Man Be So Cruel

Dear Steve and Shirley,

I am in desperate need of understanding.  Have times become so simple that a man would go through courting a woman, ask her to marry him, then divorce her within six months.  We were engaged once before I called it off due to issues with his mother.  We slowly began to see each other again.  He told me he loved me and couldn’t live without me and vowing to put his mother in check, he popped the question again.  This time things seemed wonderful.  Soon after the honeymoon resistance from his mother returned and was very visible.  Then it hit the fan. After just two months he told me that he made a mistake and wanted a divorce.  My heart dropped and I was crushed.  Leaving me to figure this out on my own he has only  reiterated that something was hidden and he is not the same man I married.  He has also become very bitter toward me.  I was a good wife, so I am confused.  I also found out he is a LIAR.  He began lying to the courts to gain favor for a quick hearing.  At this point I am on the edge.  I have already had to deal with the “I told you so’s” and the talking behind my back.  How can someone be so cruel?  Steve it’s almost as if he wants to see me so low, that I have to look up to see down.  I do not understand how he vowed to love and then turned to hate.  This man was my life for almost 10 years.  How do I move past him and not lose myself?  Please help!


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  1. Your Ex is a Ex for a reason. Think of why you cut it off the engagement first time. You now see those same issues are still there. Those issues never left. This time let him go good riddance. Let that momma’s boy go. You have nothing to lose from what I see. Be glad it happened in 6 months and not six years later

  2. Leslie Roberts says:

    Steve stated that it sounds as if the man is on the down-low… I instantly felt the same way once I heard the entire story. It is sad when things such as this takes place in relationships, however its never a reflection of the one that’s left confused.

  3. I DON'T HAND HOLD says:

    The problem is you! It doesn’t take 10 years to know this man ain’t the one. Unless you guys were having sex, which clearly clouded your judgement. I don’t see the surprise. His mother will always be his mother. You obviously avoided, or ignored her for many years. When you couldn’t take it any more, you called off the wedding. You should have left it alone. You were determined to make this fiasco work! Well, it didn’t work. Move on! The mother isn’t going anywhere. If the mother hasn’t behaved this way with any of his other females, then it’s you. Marriage is a union between families, not individuals. Sorry you wasted 10 years of your life, next time be smarter. When things aren’t going well leave.

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